For Jade

March 27th, 2009

When my Mum first got cancer I must’ve been around the age Jade’s eldest son is now. Too young, in fact, to properly comprehend what was happening, only old enough to sense the tingling presence of fear, the averted looks, the stifled, thin lipped sympathy and muddled, neighbourly compassion. My Mum, Thank God, did not die and whilst her cancer returned several times; each time more frightening for me as my innocence waned to be replaced with dread, she lives still, so I can but imagine the sad confusion of the two bereaved boys.

I knew their Mother, Jade Goody, not especially well, but Jade’s defining characteristic was her easy warmth that ingenuously enveloped folk, so perhaps like many people I felt more engaged by her than normal and feel more saddened by her death than I ought. I dislike the fetishisation of grief that accompanied the death of Jade’s forebear, The Princess of Wales, it makes me uncomfortable as I query its sincerity. Sentimentality is often called the unearned emotion and intrusive carnivals of public mourning unsettle me. In the case of Jade Goody however it is understandable to feel morose, she was a young mum from an awful background who got a break and shrewdly capitalised on it.

For a time we shared management and we met when she came to see several shows of mine at the Edinburgh festival about five years ago. We all hung out, me my Mum, Jade, some people from the agency and a few of my mates. She was a right laugh, she joined in with everyone and created a garrulous giddy vibe in bars and cars that elevated the perfunctory time between shows into something which retrospectively seems more special now than it did then. Most of all though I was impressed with how she formed an immediate and genuinely sweet bond with my Mother, chuckling and chatting with the effortless intimacy that strong yet tender women frequently conjure and which has umbrellad me from anxiety throughout my life. She also came on a few of my dopey TV shows in later years where she filled the room with her ebullience and wicked laugh connecting with the audience in a way that most skilled showman can only dream of.

One of the charges often levelled at Jade was that she was just a normal girl with no trade or practiced skills. Well people didn’t care and our heroes are not prescribed to us, we have the right to choose them and the people chose Jade. Fame has long been bequeathed by virtue of wealth and birth and this was the first generation where it was democratically distributed by that most lowbrow of modern phenomena – Reality Television. She was a person who, I think due to her class always had the propensity to irk people. When Big Brother 3 made her famous she was vilified in the paper and bullied in the house but through her spirit she won people back round and became a kind of Primark Princess with perfumes and fitness videos and endless media coverage – because people were interested in her. They remain interested. One of my best friends, a woman in her mid twenties is genuinely heartbroken at the death of Jade, herself a Mother from a working Class background she obviously connects with this sad narrative in a way that she doesn’t seem to with J-Lo or Jennifer Aniston or Posh Spice most likely because of Jade’s authenticity and accessibility.

I was working on a Celebrity Big Brother spin off show when Jade returned to the house and through unschooled social clumsiness blundered into a whooped up race row. As I said at the time, the incident where Shilpa Shetti was poorly treated by a group of young women was not an example of the sickening scourge of racism but simply a daft lack of education. Jade was a tough girl but utterly lacking in the malice upon which true prejudice depends. The slick of spilled newspaper ink and the cathode conveyed H-bomb that followed this innocuous event was the real crime. Jade was made the focus of a debilitating wave of righteous loathing and condemnation, a gleefully indignant storm of trumped up wrath that served the cause of racial harmony not one iota; but that was never it’s intention. The intention was sacrifice. Well now Jade Goody is no more. Claimed by cancer, a disease often brought on by extreme stress. When my mother was sick someone unkindly informed me that her illness was my fault, induced by my bad behaviour and for a long time I believed it.

I’m glad that Jade’s death has been handled with saccharine mittens by the papers, she lived and died in the glare of their interest and doubtless benefited from it hugely at times. I recall her tearstained face pegged across some rag as she endlessly sought to be forgiven by the media her misconstrued conduct had so incensed and it made me a little angry. She wanted to be accepted, loved, redeemed, and now through her early death, she is. I hope some of the lessons of this modern Fairy Tale are learned, that the people who aspired to be like Jade observe the price she paid. I hope her sons are ok and that on some imperceptible level contrition is felt by the media that gave Jade Goody everything.
And I mean everything.

972 Responses to “For Jade”

  1. vrtualme says:

    r.i.p.

  2. Georgina says:

    Thank you so much Russell – this is the piece I have been waiting for and longing to read: balanced, affectionate, based on real experience, kind, humane, and not tainted by envy and intellectual snobbery. You made me cry, and like a lot of people I am probably crying more for those I have personally lost than for Jade, but her life and her death was so open and generous that she provides a conduit to real grief that I think supercedes any negative connotations of sentimentality. I think sentiment is a noble human aspect softening the hard carapace of expectation and self-defence. Thank you. Thank you. Now where’s me bleedin’ Kleenex?

  3. Galinoz says:

    Spot on Mr Brand.

  4. Bex says:

    That was wonderfully respectful and sincere Russell. As someone who only really knew her from the negative press she received I think more people would do well to read what you just wrote and actually take the time to realise that she was a human being, not a travelling circus. The way the media was constantly printing about how she had weeks, days, hours to live made me sick, as if her life was some sort of insignificant scoreboard countdown; her death shouldn’t be viewed as a media bonanza, she has two small children, who; if they’re anything like I was – my mum was and is everything to me, even though I’m almost 25, I couldn’t deal with losing her now, she’s all I’ve ever had.

  5. Lisa McLaren says:

    Bless ya Russ. Your lovely. just lovely.

  6. F.O.A.B says:

    very eloquently put, nice to see someone talking sense at last.

  7. Scarlet Ibis says:

    This is beautiful. You’ve made me cry.

  8. Cat says:

    A heartfelt, touching and courageous blog – congrats Russell. Just when we think we have heard the best of you in your comedic ways you remind us what an extraordinarily sensitive and insightful brain is hidden inside your attractive head. Much love.

  9. krystal says:

    As an American I wasn’t as aware of Jade as you lot were, but I knew who she was and I’m so sad for her family and children. She was much too young.

    This is so well-written. You’ve got such a way with words.

    Rest in peace Jade.

  10. Louise says:

    Really lovely Russell. I lost my dad to cancer when I was 3 and a half, and watching Jade go through this gave me a new understanding of what it must have been like for him to leave us. And what it must have been like for my mother to lose him. I’m glad Jade decided to handle her illness the way she did.

  11. manicrose says:

    Nice job, well put. She definatley was a champion of hearts

  12. Karen says:

    Well Done Russell, beautifully written….

    Much love and best wishes to you and your mum x

  13. teresa says:

    Thank you for that blog post. It was beautifully written, deeply touched me, and gave a good prospective. I had a good friend that died at the tender age of 26 from cancer, she also came from a hard background and was trying to scrap herself up to something grand. It is hard to see the young and bright die, esp when they leave behind two small boys.

    This tragedy reminds us that cervical cancer is very aggressive and can be caused by an untreated STD (HPV). It is an STD that is not always tested in men AND men can go for years and never have a symptom – because of all of these things it is an STD that is easily spread to females – factoring in the cancer that killed Jade. Ladies, let us learn from Jade -use protection, get tested and get treated.

    Wonderfully written by the way Mr. Brand.

    -T

  14. sarah says:

    Wonderful and heartfelt piece Russell, written straight from the heart x

  15. Liz says:

    wow Russell, really beautiful

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