Comments on: ‘The squad has turned into a Caligulan sex fiasco’

By: sarah8

sarah8 — Fri, 05 Aug 2011 09:36:53 +0000

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By: house construction langley

house construction langley — Wed, 11 May 2011 16:22:50 +0000

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By: AFCnews

AFCnews — Tue, 14 Dec 2010 06:09:15 +0000

I was going crazy with the last Gunners match the other week, hopefully we can get the points up and win the premier league, Come on you gunners!

By: bob hastings

bob hastings — Fri, 07 May 2010 00:10:44 +0000

ahh i miss your guardian columns, i dont know if you still write for them as our local newsagents went out of business a while ago, however keep up the good work and keep reppin’ the UK. katy perry! BOOBALOO ;-) reacquainting myself with all your old radio shows. pin pin hahaha amazing

By: TransGester

TransGester — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 08:42:30 +0000

Dear Russell,
Where can I sigh up for ‘The squad turned Caligulan sex fiasco?’ You know how to have fun. Please be my new BFF! I’d love to show you around Seattle when you are here.

My name is Randall Cunningham. I am not the former football (not soccer) star quarterback. He is much taller and better looking than me. Nor am I the former Republican Congressman (known as “The Duke” like his friend and idol John Wayne), who resigned in disgrace after betraying the people’s trust.

I refer to myself a trans-man. Born an anatomically correct female and socialized feminine yet always feeling intuitively male; hence, I was crossed at my birth in my sex and gender identities or from the Latin trans-gendered AND trans-sexed. The delivery doctor identified me at birth as an anatomically correct female because I had and ‘inny’ not an ‘outty’. And I’m not talking about my bell button.

I am no longer cross(trans)-gendered. I had corrective surgery in 1998. I had my 34-D boobs deflated. Now I present the way I feel, as a man, consistent with my gender identity of masculine. I still consider myself cross or trans-sexed. I can never be genetically male. I would like to have an Addadicktome someday. But they are very expensive and don’t work well because doctors can dig a hole but not build the pole. The top models have a remote control. I would only get frustrated trying to find it at the necessary time. It’s bad enough when you want to watch TV. And what if I was out mowing the lawn and my neighbor’s garage door opener set off my erection? Awkward!

I play lead tenor sax in the ‘Trans-Man Band’, an all Female to Male member, Heavy Metal/Emo rock ensemble in Seattle. Favorite songs include, “You Don’t Have to Have a Dick to be One” and “The Testosterone Made Me Do It”. I also manage the ‘Post-Menstruals’, an all senior-woman musicians on medieval instruments folk group who tour the Renaissance Faire circuit. Hits off their first album, “We Baroque It You Buy It”, include “Milking the Bull” it goes, “I saw a maid milk a bull. Every stroke a bucket full…”, “Shut up and Eat Your Fucking Porridge” and “Ode to Ye Olde Astroglide”, the lyrics are, “How dry I am, how wet I’ll be, as I prepare, to fuck with thee…”. (I hope I haven’t offended thy delicate sensibilities. Sire Russell.)

Well, I look forward to our Bromance and seeing you April 23rd.
~ The TransGester

By: mrs tubby

mrs tubby — Fri, 16 Apr 2010 19:00:39 +0000

will beloved mafoo be the ole best man????????????? you and katie will have beautifull babies…. xxxx

By: Ana

Ana — Fri, 16 Apr 2010 13:57:13 +0000

You are soooo funny. I’m so happy you’re happy, getting married and all, I can’t wait until you write a book ,named something like, “baby’s first year, by Russell Brand” . I had a rubbish day yesterday and I expected the same today, but this bit you wrote made me smile.

By: palfsattic

palfsattic — Fri, 09 Apr 2010 12:41:43 +0000

Can I have a threesome with you and your missus?

By: NONIEinTX

NONIEinTX — Fri, 09 Apr 2010 03:45:49 +0000

I have to say that my heart was broken to hear that you will soon be ‘off the market’. Personally, I think that you made an excellent choice in lady love and hope the two of you nothing but the best for MANY years!! The two of you seem to be truely nice people and deserve to be happy. Congrats to both!! :)

By: faulks6164

faulks6164 — Tue, 06 Apr 2010 18:46:27 +0000

bullshit you prick